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Cross-Dressing in Fact, Fictio In several works of colonial fiction, British characters adopt disguise to escape a potentially dangerous situation or simply to have access to places ordinarily closed to members of the colonizer society. How is one to get more agency by adopting the traits of figures known to be in a situation of minority, and as such, of presumed invisibility? How can subaltern invisibility become a site of empowerment?
In colonial British fiction of the end of the nineteenth-century, several native characters were also shown to go through a process of race-passing so as to appear as European.
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Thing is, men who may have just begun learning how to handle rejection gracefully, how not to hyper-sexualise women and be generally respectful of their space and agency, seem to believe that the rules are different online. A dating app culture that on one hand thrives on candid conversation and on the other allows for secrecy and elusiveness with very few checks in place has facilitated the predatory and entitled behaviours that many urban, educated Indian men generally keep under wraps in real life.
Tinder has built a reputation as a booty call app, and neither the company nor its users—not most of them, anyway—have any qualms about using it the way the tech-gods intended it. So, propositioning someone for sex is acceptable, if not expected of you. But even then, this particular MO gives away not only a lack of communication skills but a dehumanising attitude toward women.
Kids, remember, when in doubt, talk it out. If pornography or a handful of obscure coming-of-age art films are to be believed, all non-heterosexual women spend their entire day unravelling the mysteries of their bodies and testing the boundaries of their sexual desires. Non-hetero women are highly fetishised not only in porn but also in pop culture, and these associations and perceptions follow them everywhere.
Given the cushy illusion of anonymity that online interactions provide, queer folks get directly propositioned for threesomes painfully often. And sadly for them, life off the app is no different.